Life Changes

So I know you have all been anxiously awaiting my most recent post. "Where did she go??" You were all thinking. Well I promise I have had good reason to not be blogging. Well I do right now, but I"m blogging anyway. A. and I are preparing to take in foster kids. There is a lot more going into it than I ever imagined there would be.

So that's part of the reason I'm posting. I need your help. I hate asking for donations, but this is a chunk of change to hit straight up. Hubby and I live fine on my salary, but I don't think we could have ever been prepared for what basically equates to having everything for a kid form infancy to teenager all at once. I set up a website, that you can make donations through.

http://www.gofundme.com/eg1h0 <----Donate here!! Help the kids! Care when they can't!

I don't want this to be just a donation, so how about this. Lets make it a contest. I have a business called Memorable Moments...In Motion. Yes you can see the link to my facebook page to the left. What I do with this business, is I create slideshows of your most treasured pictures and I set them to music. This comes with custom transitions and a customized menu. I have packages ranging from basic all the way up to Deluxe. Some of the favorite features of the deluxe package are customized special effects transitions between images, custom title effects, opening and closing titles, text extras (photo captions or transitional text such as poetry or verses) and customized movie like motions (such as pan and scan) The base package price for the deluxe is $115 That is for 20-50 Images. What I'm offering here is 151-200 images and 6-8 songs to be put into a custom package JUST. FOR. YOU. That's a value of $350.

PLEASE NOTE: A donation is not required for entry. It will get you an extra entry, but you don't have to. There are several ways you can enter.

1. Follow my blog. You will, of course, have to let me know.

2. Make a donation (any amount will get you an additional entry)

3. Post about this contact, and include a link to either my blog, or my donation site, and leave a comment with a link to your post on my blog!

4. Post on Facebook and tag me. Include my blog link and/or a link to the donation site.

I will post the winner on March 1st. I know it's a ways out, so I will try to keep interest going. You are all wonderful and I love you! Thanks for your love and support!

08 February 2012

Day 10 of 30

If you want a lit of the full list of 30 days of truth, click here

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

This isn't really a fair question. I don't know. Maybe it is. But generally if I need to let someone go, I do. I can't think of anyone who is actually IN my life that shouldn't be here. It is what it is.

18 October 2011

Day 9 of 30

To veiw the full list click here

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

To everything there is a season. I know that sounds kind of harsh, but things are what they are. I believe that people come into your life for a specific purpose. It's part of your experience to make you who you need to be. You react to them and love them while they are there, and try to learn from them. Hold tight if you want to keep them, if you can't keep them, thank Heavenly Father for the time they were there.

There are friends that I've drifted from, whom I still love dearly, that if we were to sit down, I honesty believe that we could just pick up where we left off. There are others that it's so awkward with, it's hard to believe we were ever friends. But if your reading this your more likely in that first category, and I love you for it!

11 October 2011

Day 8 of 30

To view the entire list of 30 days of truth Click Here

I bet you thought I'd forgotten about this. You did?! Well I didn't forget. Quite the opposite in fact. I've been thinking about this post for a long time. It's probably the most difficult one on the list, partly because there are so many emotions tied to it. Shame, Rage, frustration. Did I mention shame?

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap.

It's a struggle. Something I've been dealing with for a long time. I don't know how to write about it, and so this post might suck, but oh well. I'm not getting paid to do this, it's just the random thoughts of a rambling woman.

Everyone you come in contact with has the potential to make your life difficult. Sometimes it's your choice to let them sometimes it's not. I think the thing that I allowed to make my live crappy was bullies. They come from everywhere, and it dosen't matter who you are 97% of people either were a bully, have seen someone bullied or were the victim. I was the latter, and I let myself continue to be one for a long time. I'm still trying to overcome the taunts I heard, both from people I really cared about and people I really disliked. In high school I was 5' 8'' and weight in at approximately 165. I was a little bit chubby, but I don't think I would have considered myself fat, had I not been told that's what I was. I had little to no self esteem, a problem which I still struggle with. The echos of tubo, tub of lard, lardo, whale lady and every other "fat" name you can think of still ring in my ears at night.

I try to believe my husband when he says I'm beautiful, and he loves me the way I am, but I still never feel quite good enough. I let these people infect me SO completely that Everything I was and am needed approval of complete strangers in order to feel like I was worth anything, and even then I was better off if no one knew who I was, or that I was alive. I have a hard shell around me. I don't trust others with my feelings, and you have to try really hard to get to know me. The REAL me. The real me is terrified, and determined to fit into a little box that can stack neatly with all the other little boxes. So that's what shows. A neat little box, that gets neater all the time, and prays that no one will open the box and see what a mess is inside.

08 October 2011

Day 7 of 30

For the full list of 30 days of truth, click here

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.


This is one of our engagement photos. Hubby has been the light of my life for the past three-plus years. He loves me unconditionally, even when I'm crazy. Which, if I were honest, I would have to admit that it was most of the time. When I'm feeling stressed he figures out what will calm me down and works hard to make sure thats done. When I feel like crying he makes me laugh.

More importantly he still looks at me the same way he did when he first met me. He never tires of telling me how beautiful I am, and with someone who has a history of low self esteem, that's oober important. He looks at me like he is amazed.

He is my best friend and my rock. He helps me be strong when I just want to break down and cry.

I love you Hubby!

21 August 2011

Day 6 of 30

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

wow. This is like what's your deepest fear and I feel somewhat exposed. But I promised the truth, and the truth is what I will give. To tell the truth about this I have to go back before I was even born.

I have two older sisters. Kendra is the one I know. She is an awesome big sister. The other one, Dionne, we don't talk about much. She only lived for about six weeks. When I was younger, I remember celebrating her birthday with angel food cake, because she was mommy's angel. My mom's heart stayed broken. She was always there for us, and was the best Mom in the world. Still is. If I'm feeling broken down she's there for me. But, I always wondered what would be different if my sister had lived.

So the thing I hope I never have to do is bury a child. I can't imagine the grief my mother went through. I mourn because we are having a hard time having a child and I don't know if I could handle having a baby in my arms, and looking at her angel face and knowing that they are mine, and having that child just gone. No parent should have to bury their child. I have a couple of friends who are angel mommies and I see how much they hurt. I pray that I NEVER EVER EVER have to bury a child.

18 August 2011

Day 5 of 30

For the full list of 30 days click here

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Wow the list goes on and on with this one. There really isn't enough hours in a day (or a week for that matter) to give a complete answer to this one. I hope for a lot of things.

My biggest hope right now, the thing I want most to do, is to be a mom. Not just to be a mom but to be a great mom. A mom who is at all of her kids performances, or games, or meets or whatever.

I want to be a soccer mom. I want to be there cheering for the little toots, and I want to be there when they get home from school and be able to help them with their homework. Except math (can we say tutor?) I want to read them stories and sing songs with them. I want to take them to church and teach them about Jesus, and about the wonderful plan that our Heavenly Father has for us.

I hope to be there when they say their first word, and take their first steps. All the wonderful firsts and even the crappy ones. I want to be there for them when they first have their heart broken, and when they first fall in love. I hope to be there when they find that one person who they want to spend eternity with. I WANT them to tell me they hate me (isn't that how you know your boundaries are working?) I want to be there every step of the way for the little nudgers, and I want it more than anything I can think of. I want it so bad it's hard to breath sometimes.

It's not something I have control over so I just have to be patient, and do my best to do my best with what I have. For now, I will be a loving aunt, sister, wife, daughter, cousin and granddaughter to those amazing people I call my family, and keep holding tight to hope.

15 August 2011